“If we want the rewards of being loved we have to submit to the mortifying ordeal of being known.”
I’ve been thinking about vulnerability a lot lately. Unsurprisingly, this is something that comes up a lot with my clients. We often talk about “opening up” as if it were this singular linear process. You can either do it or you can’t. In reality, like most things, it’s multi-faceted, and ever-changing.
I don’t think of myself as a person who has a particularly hard time being vulnerable. I’m pretty open with my emotions and my life and I like to tell people how much they mean to me. Imagine my surprise when someone suggested I share my professional social media to my personal accounts and I felt an immediate aversion in my body. Oh no, absolutely not, crossover is not allowed. It took me another 6 months to summon up the courage to do so (hello, friends!).
How humbling.
Letting ourselves be vulnerable exposes our soft underbellies. Even if there is no judgment or attack, the mere experience of being seen can be terrifying in and of itself. Knowing that, I have so much admiration for the ways in which people continue to be brave.
Listening to a loved one’s voice shake as they bring up an issue between us.
Witnessing my client say something out loud that they haven’t been able to admit before.
Despite how scary it is, I think there’s something in all of us that craves to be known.
How are you practicing or witnessing vulnerability in your life? How can we be kind to ourselves and each other, knowing that we are trying to do a hard thing?
Take care,
Naomi
Announcements/Resources:
Save the date! I’ve been invited back by Leadership Education for Asian Pacifics (LEAP) to facilitate a free community workshop on Wed May 21st on celebrating our cultural heritage.
I have openings in my caseload for new individual clients. Sliding scale & superbills available.
If you, like me, are upset about what’s happening to our National Parks, use this form to send a pre-written message to your congressperson about the service staff cuts.
Some recent delights:
I recently learned the neighborhood cat is named Rascal. He is a soft orange & white color like a creamsicle and Rascal is the perfect name for him.
Magnolias are blooming!
I stumbled on Mon Laferte (literally) back in 2019 and this song has been stuck in my head again. Her Tiny Desk is also delightful.
